Forgiveness

If you live on earth for more than 24 hours one thing will be obvious to you: people will surely offend you. People will hurt you, make you angry and sometimes even make you cry. If you have not seen this yet and you are still living on this planet called Earth, just live a bit longer you will see offence come your way. You might say I am a bit on the extreme side when I say 24 hours. Yes, a 24 hour stay on Earth is even too long for one to start receiving offences. Think about new born babies, what makes them cry as soon as they are born – offence. The environment they are being welcomed into is harsh to them.

How does offence come?

Offence can come through many ways. If you are working for a man or woman and he (she) wakes up one day and fires you. How will you feel - happy? Of course not! You will definitely feel disappointed, betrayed, angry and a whole bunch of emotions [not all of them very Godly I might imagine]. Let us look at what the word says on offence.

Matthew 18:23-35 AMP

²³Therefore the kingdom of heaven is like a human king who wished to settle accounts with his attendants. ²⁴When he began the accounting, one was brought to him who owed him 10,000 talents [probably about $10,000,000], ²⁵And because he could not pay, his master ordered him to be sold, with his wife and his children and everything that he possessed, and payment to be made. ²⁶So the attendant fell on his knees, begging him, “Have patience with me and I will pay you everything.” ²⁷And his master's heart was moved with compassion, and he released him and forgave him [cancelling] the debt. ²⁸But that same attendant, as he went out, found one of his fellow attendants who owed him a hundred denarii [about twenty dollars]; and he caught him by the throat and said, ‘Pay what you owe!’ ²⁹So his fellow attendant fell down and begged him earnestly, ‘Give me time, and I will pay you all!’ ³⁰But he was unwilling, and he went out and had him put in prison till he should pay the debt.³¹When his fellow attendants saw what had happened, they were greatly distressed, and they went and told everything that had taken place to their master.³²Then his master called him and said to him, “You contemptible and wicked attendant! I forgave and cancelled all that [great] debt of yours because you begged me to. ³³And should you not have had pity and mercy on your fellow attendant, as I had pity and mercy on you?” ³⁴And in wrath his master turned him over to the torturers (the jailers), till he should pay all that he owed. ^{35 ”}So also My heavenly Father will deal with every one of you if you do not freely forgive your brother from your heart his offenses.”

Here the Boss, company chairman forgives an employee for an offence worth millions of dollars yet the same employee could not forgive his fellow worker who owed him twenty dollars. I can hear someone say that is life. It is not life; it is seed of an unforgiving heart that was planted. It breeds hurt, anger, bitterness, sickness, envy and jealousy. It breeds retaliation and strife. Let’s see what Jesus has to say on the issue of offence and unforgiveness?

Matthew 18:7 AMP

⁷Woe to the world for such temptations to sin and influences to do wrong! It is necessary that temptations come, but woe to the person on whose account or by whom the temptation comes!

Luke 17:1 AMP

¹AND [Jesus] said to His disciples, Temptations (snares, traps set to entice to sin) are sure to come, but woe to him by or through whom they come!

Jesus is telling us here that we need to pay attention to offence [not only being offended but being offensive]. He likens such situations as a temptation and a trap to catch us into the dominion of sin. You need to get to the point where you learn how to say sorry from the heart. Have you ever received an apology from someone who tries to justify why they did what they did to offend you? These apologies are usually littered with the word “but”. In the English language this word but means [except, however, excluding – amongst other things]. It is also a conjunction we use to link phrases or clauses together. These are all words one uses when they are trying to justify their actions a bit or trying to link a reason for their wrong-doings. Be careful about using this word. When you use this word, when you are making an apology, what you are saying for instance is, ‘I am sorry I hurt your feelings but I am not really sorry I did or said what I did because you did ....” This is precisely why you felt that the apology was insincere.

There are many times we offend people without realizing that we have offended them. Situations like these are classified in the bible as sins of omission. In some cases people’s actions can offend God without them knowing it. My prescription in this case is to always ask God for forgiveness each time we are praying either in our closet or in the gatherings of the saints. Beloved do not take it for granted that you are holy and beyond making mistakes or that because you are a Pastor or a Bishop you are infallible. No! Praying prayers of forgiveness always means walking in humility with God. It renews, regenerates and revitalizes our relationship with God.

The next question is what do you do when you are hurt, boiling with anger caused by someone who does not even know he or she has hurts you or fully taken responsibility –like in the situation above? Or even by someone who is feeling unconcerned by his or her actions? Child of God the only way is to ask Holy Spirit to take the anger away and let go of your right to get your pound of flesh! Eschew bitterness and anger from your heart. Don’t allow them to take root in your soul. The soul is where anything planted in the body takes root. Weed it out before it becomes a tree that bears bitter fruit.

Un-forgiveness in your heart will hinder you from moving forward and prevent your prayers from receiving the attention of God. An unforgiving spirit is a cankerworm that eats the very fabric of a soul. It hinders and serves as a block to both spiritual and material growth. It stands against God’s blessing from reaching either party. Your lack of forgiveness in this case is only hurting you alone. You are the only one boiling in anger alone, so forgive and let go!

Again your lack of forgiveness is hurting you in more ways than the person who offended you. You suffer twice because you are being hurt and wounded in the spirit and God will not answer your prayers because He commanded us to forgive.

Note, it is not all the time that forgiveness guarantees reconciliation but it guarantees healing for you. It is possible to forgive someone who has offended you but sometimes it is not possible to resume a normal friendship again. I am sure you have heard the saying that unforgiveness is like a man drinking poison and expecting his enemy to die from it. So forgive and set yourself free. Give yourself that gift that comes with forgiveness, you deserve it.

Finally forgiveness is a golden rule that God uses to deal with every one of us. The measure we forgive is the measure we get from Him. “Forgive us our debts as we forgive others their debts.” It is a divine principle.